American voters must choose between two sharply divergent visions for the future. Option A is freedom and prosperity, as embodied by the historically successful incumbent president, Donald J. Trump. Option B is the apocalyptic nightmare that would descend upon the American heartland in the unlikely event that any of the remaining Democratic candidates is elected.
In other words, the choice is clear. But that has not stopped media institutions like the New York Times from attempting to distinguish among the numerous white candidates seeking the Democratic nomination by publishing an "endorsement." The Times, a once-storied newspaper dominated by wealthy white people with ties to Ivy League universities, on Sunday officially endorsed two wealthy white people with ties to Ivy League universities.
It goes without saying that members of the media should not make political endorsements. In an ideal world, journalists would be banned from all forms of political activity save, perhaps, nominating a spokesman to relay their concerns to the leadership at the Guantanamo Bay detention facility in Cuba. Alas, notwithstanding the historic presidency of Donald J. Trump, we do not live in an ideal world. Yet.
Political endorsements, as a rule, should only be made by people who matter and should only concern political contests of maximum import. That is why the Washington Free Beacon is endorsing the most attractive candidates for First Lady of the United States in 2020. They are Melania Trump and Ivanka Trump. Also, Tiffany Trump.
Endorsing a candidate for First Lady not named Trump would, in our esteemed estimation, be an exercise in futility. Melania, the incumbent, has demonstrated a commanding grace and sense of style that Americans of all genders can admire. The success of her "Be Best" initiative has shattered the toxic stereotypes perpetuated by her predecessor, Michelle Obama. Being FLOTUS can and should involve more than simply lecturing children about vegetables and planting a garden in your backyard.
Ivanka Trump would also be a fabulous choice to serve in the highest female office in the land. Exceptional breeding has gifted her with phenomenal beauty and a formidable intellect, especially when compared to her lesser male siblings. Ivanka's choice of husband, Jared Kushner, who fits the (somewhat politically incorrect) mold of the traditional Alpha Male, suggests she has the judgment to one day command the most powerful military on Earth. One day, God willing, Ivanka will prove Sen. Bernie Sanders (I., Vt.) wrong once and for all by demonstrating that, yes, a woman can become president.
Though this year's decision to endorse more than one FLOTUS candidate represented a break from Free Beacon tradition, a nagging question remained—"Why not three?"—to which there was no good answer. Tiffany Trump should also be considered for the role of First Lady. She has the youth. She has the pedigree. She has a decent Instagram account.
There will be those dissatisfied that this page is not throwing its weight behind a single candidate, but given the near certainty that Donald Trump will be reelected in 2020, we were bored and didn't know what else to do.
Mrs. Trump and Mrs. Trump and Miss Trump right now are the female leaders best equipped to stand by Mr. Trump's side as he continues to make this country great.
May the best woman win.