Satire

Patriarchy Exposed: CNN ‘Analysis’ Finds Women Who Want to Be President Are Facing ‘Scrutiny’

Sexism likely to blame

Maeve Reston is a national political reporter at CNN, where she published glowing coverage of the Democratic presidential candidates during the primary. Maeve raved about Kamala Harris's facial expressions, Beto O'Rourke's incessant apologizing, and Joe Biden's walking speed. Those were simpler times.

After Biden wrapped up the party's nomination, Reston dropped the pretense of being a reporter and started publishing critical "analysis" of President Donald Trump—because CNN doesn't do enough of that already. Her analysis of the president's speech on July 4, for example, was particularly insightful, and nothing if not unique:

On a very different Fourth of July holiday, when many Americans are wrestling with the racist misdeeds of the country's heroes and confronting an unrelenting pandemic with surging cases, their commander-in-chief is attempting to drag America backward—stirring fear of cultural change while flouting the most basic scientific evidence about disease transmission.

Reston's most recent analysis is about Biden's search for a running mate, and poses a compelling question: The (female) politicians under consideration for the VP nomination are facing "scrutiny" of an "intense" degree. Is sexism to blame? Probably:

Joe Biden's decision on his running mate is drawing closer by the day, and the tensions over whom he should pick spilled out into public view this past week, as the women who are his top contenders find themselves navigating around sexist tropes about their ambition and intense scrutiny of the most controversial aspects of their pasts.

What is the evidence of sexism? Well, one of Reston's favorite candidates in the primary, Sen. Harris (Calif.), "implicitly invoked sexism" during an online conference in response to reports that Biden "does not want to be outshone" and "wants the win to be about him." Some of Biden's advisers have reportedly soured on Harris, who launched her career by dating a much older political juggernaut (Free Beacon Man of the Year Willie Brown) and has been accused of being overly ambitious.

Other VP contenders, such as Rep. Karen Bass (Calif.), are also being criticized. As far as Bass is concerned, she's been forced to defend herself against attacks on her sympathy for Fidel Castro and her participation in an opening ceremony at a Scientology church in Los Angeles.

Reston concludes: "In a deeply polarizing election cycle, as many Americans fight for their economic and physical survival, this group [of VP contenders] is likely to face more intense scrutiny than any group that has come before them in this final stretch."

Maybe it's the polarization, or maybe VP candidates are facing additional scrutiny because Democratic voters nominated a 77-year-old geezer who has trouble stringing together complete sentences. Biden may not survive long enough to be sworn into office in 2021. But on the other hand, sexism.

In any event, Biden should just end this pointless charade and nominate the most qualified candidate: His old friend and like-minded serial groper, Chris Dodd.