President Donald J. Trump renewed his demand for an investigation into Democratic frontrunner Joe Biden during an early morning phone call with Ukrainian president Volodymyr Zelensky on Wednesday, according to a transcript obtained exclusively by the Washington Free Beacon.
Just last month, the Free Beacon obtained the transcript of a call in which Trump urged Zelensky to publicly exonerate Biden in an effort to boost the bumbling candidate's chances of surviving the Democratic primary. Biden's strong showing on Super Tuesday, however, appears to have caused the president to reconsider once again.
Editor's Note: Joe Biden's renegade son, Hunter, was a 2019 Free Beacon Man of the Year.
MEMORANDUM OF TELEPHONE CONVERSATION SUBJECT:
(C) Telephone Conversation with President Zelenskyy of Ukraine
PARTICIPANTS: President Zelenskyy of Ukraine
Notetakers: Dan Scavino, Sergey Lavrov
DATE, TIME March 4, 2020, 02:29 – 2:41 a.m. EST
PLACE: Residential Commode (Primary)
(S/NF) The President: Hello, Mr. President! How is my favorite Ukrainian hoax-buster doing?
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: It’s always an honor to speak with you, Mr. President.
(S/NF) The President: Yeah, I'm sure it is. Look, we need something public on the Bidens. You have to announce the investigation.
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: I don’t understand.
(S/NF) The President: Turn on CNN, which I never watch, by the way. That Jim Acosta is a sad, sad human being. I don't think his mother ever really loved him. They're showing the election results. Bernie shat the bed. He's a crazy communist, as I'm sure you know. He loves Castro and kiddie porn. His wife is wanted by the FBI. That's what a lot of people are saying. Biden is gonna run away with this thing. You need to announce right away.
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: But I thought you wanted him exonerated.
(S/NF) The President: Did I say that?
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: Yes, on our last call.
(S/NF) The President: That doesn't sound like me. Did you know his son is a crackhead? A woman in every port. Babies all over the world. Apparently he's an artist now. You know what they say about artists?
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: No, I don't. What do you want me to do, exactly?
(S/NF) The President: Let’s make a deal. I want something in return for all the beautiful military equipment we gave you.
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: We are very grateful, Mr. President.
(S/NF) The President: Listen to me. I want to be a nice guy about this. Nice guys do favors for each other, right?
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: Well, you didn’t hear it from me, but we’ve started an investigation into Elizabeth Warren.
(S/NF) The President: Pocahontas? That's what we call her over here. Do you have any Indians in Ukraine? I really wanted to run against her. We had a deal with the Redskins to send their chief to the Republican convention. Tomahawks, Tee-pees, Rudy was all over it. You're wasting your time on her.
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: Wasting our time?
(S/NF) The President: She’s a loser. I’m telling you, the Democrats are gonna nominate Biden. The blacks love him. He’s big with the elderly. He has the Deep State and Wall Street in his pocket. Look what they’ve done to the stock market. The most beautiful stock market we’ve ever seen, until the virus hoax. President Xi, a very powerful man, is with me on this. But our media here is so corrupt. I would never use the word ‘evil,' but that's what they are.
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: I don’t know how much help I can be with the coronavirus. We are all dealing with this outbreak.
(S/NF) The President: Yes, I know. We’ve been dealing with it perfectly. You know I’m not a big fan of vaccines, but we’re working on one.
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: That’s great news.
(S/NF) The President: I know what you’re thinking. Why not go to the CDC? They’re in on the hoax, okay? They’re nerds. You can’t trust a nerd. I’m telling you, it’s just crazy over here. The media is up my ass, and Bette Midler has been very unfair to me on Twitter.
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: Of course, Mr. President. I understand.
(S/NF) The President: I’m telling you, Z, you’re one of five people I can trust right now. It’s you, Scavino, Devin Nunes, Gary Busey, and Bill Clinton.
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: I’m honored, sir.
(S/NF) The President: I’m sure you are, but I need you to help us out. Be a nice guy. Announce the investigation. Does Joe Biden have the coronavirus? He's been shaking all those hands on the campaign trail. His brain is not functioning. He’s getting attacked by vegans. His words don’t even make sense.
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: I’m sorry, Mr. President. My country does not have the capability.
(S/NF) The President: You’ll figure it out. I’m sending Dr. Ben Carson over there to help. He’s the best we have. He stabbed a guy once, but that was before his medical training.
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: Isn’t he your housing minister?
(S/NF) The President: He’s a brain surgeon. And he’s black, in case you were wondering. My uncle at MIT was a nuclear brain surgeon. He was white.
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: That’s very interesting.
(S/NF) The President: So you’re gonna do the investigation?
(S/NF) President Zelenskyy: I have to go to a budget meeting.
(S/NF) The President: I believe in you, Z. Talk soon.
— End of Conversation —