Culture

2019 Man of the Year: Conan the Dog

Conan
Conan / Getty Images

Dog is man's best friend. Unless that man is a raping, murdering terrorist.

Conan, the adorable Belgian Malinois and Delta Force officer, helped kill ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi during a special forces operation in Syria back in October. The terrorist leader was forced to retreat into a dead-end tunnel while "screaming, crying, and whimpering," according to President Trump. With Conan bearing down on him, the most wanted man in the world took the coward's way out by blowing up himself and several of his children.

Conan was injured during the raid but quickly recovered. He was back to work a short time later before being granted a brief leave to visit the White House and receive an official certificate and award for his brave service.

"This particular dog is the ultimate fighter," President Trump said of Conan at the event. "The ultimate everything."

There was some confusion as to Conan's gender, but Conan ain't no bitch.

The heroic K9 has since returned to service and is back in action with his handler, likely sniffing out the next terrorist bastard right now.

Good boy, Conan. Good boy.