CNN Hasn't Fired Toobin Yet, But Just Hired a Key Witness to His Zoom Call Wanking Incident

December 8, 2020

CNN still hasn't announced the firing of its chief legal analyst, Jeffrey Toobin, who was let go by the New Yorker last month after pleasuring himself on an employee Zoom call.

The New Yorker's decision to fire Toobin was driven by the company's desire to foster "an environment where everyone feels respected and upholds our standards of conduct." CNN appears to have a different set of standards for employee conduct.

Perhaps due to the masturbatory nature of the network's political coverage, CNN has resisted public pressure to fire Toobin, or to punish him at all for jerking off in front of his coworkers.

After the incident was first reported, the New Yorker suspended Toobin pending the results of an investigation. CNN, on the other hand, granted Toobin's request "for some time off while he deals with a personal issue."

CNN has yet to provide any update on Toobin's employment status at the network, but reporting suggests he will "probably" return as a legal analyst after the masturbation scandal has died down. A CNN spokesperson did not respond to a request for comment on Toobin's employment status at the network.

Meanwhile, CNN recently announced the hiring of a key witness to the masturbation incident that prompted Toobin's firing at the New Yorker. Evan Osnos, a staff writer at the magazine who took part in the now-infamous Zoom call, is the newest addition to CNN's stable of contributors. Osnos is the first CNN contributor—that we know of—who has seen Jeffrey Toobin's dick.