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FACT CHECK: Climate Activists Who Smeared Paint on Priceless Sculpture Insist 'We Are Adults'

Verdict: Then act like it

April 28, 2023

Claim: "We are adults. We should be at home working."

Who said it: A climate freak sitting on the floor with his lady accomplice after smearing what we can only hope was paint on the pedestal and display case surrounding a priceless sculpture—Little Dancer Aged Fourteen by Edgar Degas—at the National Gallery of Art in Washington, D.C.

Context: It's not the first time this sort of thing has happened. Climate activists have been smearing liquids on priceless works of art for a while now. Occasionally they glue themselves. In October, for example, two anti-oil freaks glued themselves to the wall after smearing tomato soup on a Van Gogh painting at the National Gallery in London.

Climate Activists Who Glued Themselves to Famous Dutch Painting Sentenced to Prison

Analysis: We're going to break this claim down into two parts and issue verdicts for each. Let's start with the first: "We are adults." Dictionary.com defines the word adult as "a person who has attained the age of maturity as specified by law" or "a person who is fully grown or developed."

From a legal standpoint, these obnoxious individuals are technically adults. From a physical standpoint, they are "fully grown." From a mental, emotional, and behavioral perspective, they are not adults. They are child savages unfit for the modern world. Sadly, this is what happens when disgruntled anti-social atheists try to fill their lives with meaning.

The second part of their claim is a little more complicated. As legal adults, they absolutely should be at home or working instead of faffing about in a museum and causing trouble for the security guards who really don't have time for this shit. Nevertheless, their sub-adult temperaments suggest they are ill-suited for employment outside of academia. In an ideal world, they would be incarcerated or otherwise institutionalized for the rest of their miserable lives.

Verdict #1: "We are adults." We rate this claim 3.5 Clintons.

Verdict #2: "We should be at home working." We rate this claim 1.5 Clintons.