Politics

Underachiever of the Year: Hillary Clinton

Eldery homeowner can't sell books or magazines, earns less money than failed quarterback Jay Cutler

Biggest loser.

It’s been an eventful year, folks. We’ve already recognized Chris Hughes and Sean Eldridge as Couple of the Year for their efforts to destroy the dangerous myth that, in America, massive unearned wealth always translates into success. And be sure to stay tuned as we announce the winners of the Free Beacon’s 2014 Man of the Year awards.

Until then, we have no choice but to single out an individual who repeatedly failed to live up to expectations in 2014. The Free Beacon award for Underachiever of the Year goes to: Hillary Clinton (public speaker).

Clinton began the year by gearing up to publish a 656-page memoir called "Hard Choices," for which she received a multimillion-dollar advance. The book failed to live up to the hype. Sales underwhelmed, and just days after the book was released to public, the New York Times reported that Clinton’s publisher, Simon & Schuster, was unlikely to make enough money to recoup her massive advance.

As part of her nationwide tour to promote her failed memoir, Clinton appeared on the cover of People Magazine, and set off a firestorm over her alleged use of an old person’s walker. The magazine issue, like her book, was a total flop. It sold the fewest copies of any People issue in 2014, despite the added buzz surrounding WalkerGate.

Democrats running in this year’s midterm elections weren’t paying attention, apparently, because they kept asking Clinton to come stump for them. On the campaign trail, Clinton struggled to draw large crowds, and was put to shame by potential GOP contenders such as Rick Perry.

Not surprisingly, Clinton’s endorsements failed to translate into victories at the polls. In almost every close race across the country in which she took part, the Democratic candidate lost. In some cases, Clinton publicly backed candidate with no chance of winning (e.g., Sean Eldridge) in order to curry favor with his wealthy spouse.

Clinton, who continues to charge universities exorbitant fees to hear her speak, still struggles to draw crowds. For example, very few students showed up to a recent event at Georgetown University, which is especially concerning for a potential Democratic frontrunner hoping to inspire the same enthusiasm among young voters as the current president was able to do in 2008 and 2012.

Last but not least, Clinton has failed to achieve significant success in the area she’s care about most: making money. Clinton will always be rich, but her income doesn’t appear to be living up to her own greed. It’s unclear how much she has earned since quitting her job as Secretary of State. Bloomberg reported in July that Clinton had earned at least $12 million on the public speaking circuit since February 2013.

That may sound like a lot, but it’s pretty insubstantial when compared to the likes of Chicago Bears quarterback and perennial underachiever Jay Cutler, who is currently earning a base salary of $17.5 million in 2014, and was recently benched in favor of this guy. No wonder Elizabeth Warren is stealing Clinton’s spotlight.

While it is always somewhat heartbreaking to see someone so obsessed with accumulating even more money, power, and influence fail to achieve those ends, it is nonetheless inspiring for all of us normal Americans to know that extreme wealth and political connections do not always guarantee success.

Chin up, Hillary. There's always next year.