Satire

Republicans Continue Lead in Fight Against COVID-19

Sen. Ron Portman (R., Ohio) with President Donald Trump (R.)

President Donald J. Trump (allegedly) lost reelection to Joe Biden despite the significant "experience gap" between the two candidates regarding the COVID-19 pandemic. Trump, for example, personally contracted the virus and cured himself within days, while Biden opted to hide in a basement.

The election might be over, but that hasn't stopped Republicans from assuming a leadership role in the fight against COVID-19. Sen. Rob Portman (R., Ohio) on Tuesday announced his participation in a Johnson & Johnson COVID-19 vaccine trial, making him the first member of Congress to put his body on the line for the good of the country.

"I look at it as a way I can play a small role in supporting our country's health care response to this pandemic," a humble yet courageous Portman said in a statement. "The more people Johnson & Johnson has in the trial, the sooner they can have the complete data they need to finalize this phase of the trial, and move on to the FDA approval process."

Portman said his decision to join the trial was motivated in part by a desire to boost public confidence in a COVID-19 vaccine, which is expected to be widely available sometime next year. In the final weeks of the 2020 campaign, Democratic politicians helped fuel public skepticism toward a vaccine by urging Americans not to trust scientific developments that occurred on President Trump's watch.

Portman is Republican, not a Democrat.