San Francisco Gets The Leader It Deserves

Meet District Attorney Chesa Boudin: Bill Ayers prodigy, Hugo Chávez aide, public urination advocate

November 13, 2019

The biography of San Francisco's newly elected district attorney reads like a shallow parody authored by a right wing Andy Borowitz. Consider, for example, the following facts about Chesa Boudin, the 39-year-old attorney who narrowly won the race to become the city's top prosecutor:

  • He was raised by Weather Underground terrorist Bill Ayers after Boudin's parents were jailed for their role in an armed heist that left two police officers and a security guard dead.
  • One of his grandfathers was an attorney for Fidel Castro.
  • His great-great-uncle was a Marxist theoretician.
  • He earned two master's degrees while studying at Oxford on a Rhodes Scholarship.
  • Before enrolling at Yale Law School, he worked as translator for Venezuelan dictator Hugo Chávez.
  • He publicly praised Chávez in 2009 for the dictator's controversial campaign to abolish term limits.
  • He was endorsed by "civil rights activist" Shaun King, who is also a fan of domestic terrorism.
  • He has never prosecuted a case.
  • He has a beard.
  • Boudin's election, in his own words, was a "powerful and clear" endorsement of his pledge to implement "radical change to how we envision justice." He vowed, for example, to end prosecution of "quality-of-life crimes" including "public camping, offering or soliciting sex, public urination, and blocking a sidewalk." The city's resources, he argued, would be better spent targeting police misconduct and corporate crime.

    The San Francisco Police Officers Association aggressively opposed Boudin's candidacy, and launched a $600,000 ad campaign calling him "the number one choice of criminals and gang members." Boudin reportedly learned of his victory on a flight home from New York, where he was visiting his father, David Gilbert, at a maximum security prison facility in upstate New York.

    Boudin's opponent, interim district attorney Suzy Loftus, was the preferred choice of the Democratic Party establishment, having received endorsements from Senators Dianne Feinstein and Kamala Harris, San Francisco mayor London Breed, and California governor Gavin Newsom. Boudin's election was greeted with trepidation by concerned city residents and other opponents of public defecation.

    Boudin will join a San Francisco city government that has struggled to address the city's problems, which include rampant homelessness and the highest property crime rate in the country. City officials have instead devoted their time to designating the National Rifle Association as a "domestic terrorist organization," denouncing a "racist" mural of George Washington at a public high school bearing the Founding Father's name, and proposing new language guidelines that would replace the term "convicted felon" with "justice-involved person." The district attorney election results suggest that San Francisco voters are getting the leader they deserve.

    On a related note, a new mural of celebrity truancy advocate Greta Thunberg will soon look down upon the city's feces-riddled streets—a fitting metaphor for the perverse dichotomy of decadence and despair that pervades in so many of America's "woke" urban environments after decades of Democratic rule.