Parody

The Conservative Case for a Coup

Real authoritarianism has never been tried in America

Decadence is a helluva drug, and America is addicted. That includes you, dear reader, and everyone you know. Irredeemably possessed of self-infatuation. Pining for the perfect tweet. Smothered in selfie filters. Hanging brain on conference calls. Emotionally invested in "elections" and their "results." Who "won" this time? Who cares? It's time for an intervention.

NO KIDDING: America’s Children Weigh in on the Trump-Biden Debate

One of the perks of being a professional journalist is all the text messages we get from friends explaining how their children reacted to various political events. CNN's Jake Tapper, for example, shared one of these exchanges on air following the first presidential debate between Donald Trump and Joe Biden.

CENTER STAGE: Five Crucial Tax Questions for Joe Biden

The American people deserve answers

President Donald Trump and former vice president Joe Biden will square off in Cleveland on Tuesday in the first presidential debate. They will discuss a number of issues, including whether or not Biden is under the influence of performance-enhancing drugs, and why his campaign refused to submit to an earpiece inspection.

I Forced A Bot to Write an Amy Coney Barrett Story Based on Media Reporting and This Was the Result

Using advanced algorithmic technology purchased on the dark web, the Washington Free Beacon has created a bot capable of performing journalism at a professional level. This week, we forced the bot to review media reports on Amy Coney Barrett, the frontrunner to be President Donald Trump's nominee to the Supreme Court, and asked it to write its own report based on that analysis. Here is the result.