Bored White House Reporters Cry in Their Cheerios

The press corps prepares to celebrate itself for bangup reporting—on the last administration 

White House Press Correspondents / Getty Images

This weekend's White House Correspondents' Dinner will give mainstream media reporters the chance to do what they love most: parade in front of the camera; hobnob with each other in the guise of "doing good"; and fete, honor, and praise themselves as an indispensable and virtuous force in American life.

And last but not least, to yuk it up with a president they are supposed to be holding to account, but for whom they instead provide cover because he is a friend and a political ally.

Look no further than the awardees of this weekend's festivities. Two years into the Biden administration, precisely zero are being honored for reporting on the current president. Axios's Jonathan Swan—admittedly a bright spot at an outlet that now dispenses advice on gut bacteria and "How squats power your life"—will be honored as the MVP of the White House press corps for a podcast documenting the end of the Trump presidency. ABC News's Jonathan Karl will be celebrated for coverage of the Jan. 6 riot. And a pair of Associated Press reporters will get a trophy for a scoop on the Centers for Disease Control's decision to ditch masks.

Meanwhile, Politico reports on the "rise and fall of the star White House reporter." Once the "crown jewel" of reportorial gigs, the job has, apparently, become a "bore" in the Biden era because stories "lack flair." (Somehow, the Free Beacon has managed to find a couple of good ones!)

One moron who will surely be out celebrating himself this weekend is quoted as follows: "The work is a lot less rewarding, because you're no longer saving democracy from Sean Spicer and his Men's Wearhouse suit," this person said. "Jawing with Jen just makes you look like an asshole."

The Biden administration's disastrous abandonment of Afghanistan left 13 Marines dead. The Southern border is a veritable war zone. Inflation is at historic highs. The economy may be in recession. And the president is losing his marbles.

There's no deficit of bad news to cover, scandals to unearth, failures to reveal—what's missing is a serious, credible, and unbiased corps of White House correspondents to do the work. Have fun this weekend, assholes!