Taliban Weigh in on Petraeus Scandal


With former CIA director David Petraeus engulfed in a sex scandal that has ended his career and damaged his legacy, spokesmen for the terrorist army Petraeus fought in Afghanistan have stepped forward to comment.

When approached by the AFP on Petraeus’s extramarital affairs, an unnamed Taliban official offered his take:

“From a Pashtun point of view, Petraeus should be shot by relatives from his mistress’s family,” the Taliban official explained.

“From a Shariah point of view, he should be stoned to death.”

Further demonstrating how truly dangerous the terrorist organization is, the official succinctly described his views on Western relationships:

“It’s quite normal for Americans and Western people to behave like this—they live in free sex societies where nobody cares about this sort of thing, so what do you expect?” he said.