Washington Post reporter Dave Weigel was shutout by Republican Rep. Matt Gaetz (Fla.) in a recent game of Madden NFL 17.
In the inaugural episode of the Washington Post series "Playing Games with Politicians," Weigel played the Florida Republican in thirty minutes of Madden on the video game streaming service Twitch. Weigel played as the reigning Super Bowl champion Philadelphia Eagles while Gaetz played as his hometown Tampa Bay Buccaneers.
Weigel immediately lowered expectations before the game began. "He's going to own us; I assume he's going to beat me," he correctly predicted. The Florida congressman likewise revealed as he sat down that he had never played the game on the XBox One, seemingly putting the men on equal footing.
But Weigel got two penalties in the first two plays of the game, first by kicking the ball out-of-bounds and then by roughing quarterback Jameis Winston. That gave Gaetz excellent field position and allowed him to drive down the field for a score.
The pitiful play from Weigel continued with the reporter getting a three-and-out and punting, even though only weak-ass bitches punt in Madden. After letting Gaetz burn him for a touchdown on a deep pass, he proceeded to run the wrong direction on a kick return.
Gaetz peppered his play with banter. "If you could throw a slant as well as you could provide a left-wing media slant, maybe you wouldn't be down by two touchdowns right now," he said at one point.
At another, he defended President Donald Trump's recent conduct on a diplomatic trip to Russia, suggesting it was strategic unpredictability. "Your offense, by comparison, is very predictable," he told Weigel.
"All these foreign policy [jokes], I need to join a committee so I can think of all these zingers," Weigel said.
"A committee, a support group, whatever it is you need, Dave," Gatez responded.
Gaetz ended up winning 26 to zilch. Weigel finished the game with five interceptions and a missed field goal.