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South Park: Hillary Clinton Is a Turd Sandwich

South Park / Screenshot
• September 14, 2016 11:00 pm

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The premiere of the 20th season of South Park didn't spare Hillary Clinton Wednesday night, labeling her a "Turd Sandwich" that no one wanted to support.

The character of Mr. Garrison, filling the role of "Giant Douche" Donald Trump and sporting an obviously fake tan, panics during the episode when the polls show him likely to defeat his Democratic opponent, despite the fact that he has no idea how to govern.

He feels he has to ensure a Turd Sandwich victory, but he and GOP running mate Caitlyn Jenner find it impossible to convince voters to support a turd.

"I'm calling from the campaign for president, just seeing if I can get your support for Hillary Clinton today," Garrison says on the phone. "Yes, I know she's a Turd Sandwich, but, you know, if you look past that, you know, she really has a lot to offer … Sometimes in life, you just got to suck a turd, you know?"

The episode, which also lampooned the Colin Kaepernick controversy, climaxes at a 49ers-Panthers game, which both Clinton and Garrison attend to hear the unveiling of J.J. Abrams' reboot of the national anthem.

"This is such a big night for America that both presidential candidates are here. There you can see the Turd Sandwich waving to all four people excited by her, and there's the Giant Douche doing the same," the announcer says.

In Wednesday's episode, young Stan Marsh laments the fact that the country has to choose between turds and douches every four years.

"Because we're Americans," Randy Marsh replies. "Because this is America."

South Park first used the joke of the U.S. being forced to choose between a turd and a douche in 2004, when it sent up the election race between John Kerry and George W. Bush.

Published under: Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton, Humor