13 Dark Horse Candidates for White House Chief of Staff

President Trump is having a hard time finding a new chief of staff to run his White House, and he is reportedly "super pissed" about it. That's only natural for a proven leader with high standards. But until the perfect candidate (Hope Hicks) comes to her senses and accepts the job, here are a few other candidates the president should consider.

Who: Bobby Knight

Why: Trump supporter with leadership credentials

Why Not: White House chairs are heavy/expensive

Who: Emmanuel Macron

Why: Sexually sophisticated world leader with a firm handshake; Could use a change from his current employment situation

Why Not: Neoliberal sissy; French

Who: Paul Manafort

Why: Loyal henchman with previous experience working for Trump; It would massively own the libs

Why Not: Pending criminal charges in state courts

Who: Silk

Why: Loyalist adored by Trump; Diamond holding her back; Needs to step into the spotlight on her own

Why Not: She wouldn't have time for Jared's prep school shenanigans

Who: The Romney Boys

Why: They're everything Eric and Don Jr. aren't; I mean, just look at them

Why Not: Petty jealousy

Who: Reginald VelJohnson

Why: Law and order experience; Adept at dealing with obnoxious nerds (vital for media relations); Helped take down a terrorist cell at Nakatomi Plaza

Why Not: Thespian

Who: Dick Cheney

Why: Greatest Living Vice President

Why Not: N/A

Who: USA Freedom Kids

Why: Talented patriots; Potential for "White House: The Musical" to knock "Hamilton" off its high horse

Why Not: Litigious history; Sued the Trump campaign for breach of contract

Who: The Orb

Why: Bestows galactic intellect upon all worthy individuals who lay hands on it

Why Not: Has trouble delegating; Troubling criminal background

Who: Glenn Parness

Why: Previous experience as White House chief of staff under President Thomas Whitmore

Why Not: Fictional; Killed in the alien attack on NORAD

Who: Trumpy Bear

Why: Non-confrontational; Good listener; Adorable

Why Not: Made in China

If any of these don't work out, there's always the nuclear option…