The Lackluster Democratic Field

2020 Dems

Beto O’Rourke is lost. The former Democratic congressman, who unsuccessfully challenged Ted Cruz in last year’s election, has spent the last few weeks in a confused and melancholy state. Something possessed him to live-stream a recent dental cleaning, perhaps the grossest introduction of a potential presidential candidate in the nation’s history. He gave an interview to the Washington Post where the only specific plank in his immigration platform was opposition to President Trump’s border wall. In the same interview, he mused that the Constitution may no longer apply to the United States, since we’re an “empire” with troops deployed around the globe and “trading agreements.”

On The Trail: The Resplendent Prose Stylings of 2020 Frontrunner Beto O’Rourke

R. Francis “Beto” O’Rourke, whose political achievements include losing an election to charisma juggernaut Ted Cruz, has emerged as the undisputed frontrunner to win the Democratic nomination for president in 2020. He’s a Kennedyesque “White Obama” who skateboards and makes liberals “horny”¬†with his intimate livestreams. Beto O'Rourke cutting steak on Instagram is making people horny: …