The past four months have been tough. In early May, the Washington Free Beacon learned that Kate Upton was engaged to Justin Verlander. We declared it an American tragedy, and tried to move on. “If you truly love something, you have to know when to let it go,” I was told. Over the summer, The Free Beacon had no Kate Upton. …
One thing you want in a president is someone who loves the Constitution—and someone who has a hale and hearty constitution. Our president has to travel the world on behalf of the United States, going from the tropical climes of Southeast Asia to the frosty steppes of Russia. You want someone who isn’t going to wilt in the face of pressure, someone who can handle whatever the weather throws her way.
In other words, you don’t want someone who melts in the mid-70s.
It is with great regret that I must report that Kate Upton, our finest existing representation of American greatness and muse of the Washington Free Beacon, is off the market and has been for weeks. Upton announced the engagement at last night’s Met Gala by showing up wearing an engagement ring given to her by Detroit Tigers pitcher …
Kate Upton solidified her status as America’s greatest woman this weekend. She hosted an event to help find housing for homeless puppies by matching them with military veterans suffering from PTSD.
This was the second year Upton held the Grand Slam Adoption Event with boyfriend Justin Verlander while he is in Florida for Detroit Tiger spring training. Last year’s event was “glorious,” according to my analysis, and this year’s was just as good.
Look at how happy these pups are just to be in the same place as Kate Upton:
As the Free Beacon‘s film critic, I have to keep my ear to the ground about hot news tips you, our loyal readers, might be interested in. And I know of no one (well, almost no one) who prompts quite as much interest from Free Beacon fans as one Alexandra Daddario. Needless to say, I was pretty excited to see that the rumors are true!