Hmmm.
1: Jaws 2: A.I. 3: Catch Me 4: CETK 5: Empire of the Sun 6: Lincoln 7: Raiders 8: Minority Report 9: Sugarland Express 10: Duel
— Glenn Kenny (@Glenn__Kenny) June 11, 2015
While I greatly enjoy Glenn's writing (check out his quick post on Christopher Lee's passing!), I'm not quite onboard with this ranking. And because the only reason to be on the Internet is to pick longwinded fights with people, allow me to suggest an alternate, correct ranking of Steven Spielberg's top ten.
10. Munich
Leave aside the vaguely dopey politics—the cycle of violence, duuuude, it's bad—and instead focus on the incredibly fraught nature of the set pieces. This is high-precision filmmaking at its best, a series of interconnected ticking time bombs and immaculately constructed set pieces that tighten the tension with clockwork precision.
9. A.I.
Likely a controversial inclusion on any such list ("No to E.T. and yes to A.I.? No wonder everyone says you're wrong all the time, Bunch"), A.I. falls firmly in the "interesting failure" camp. I mean, the horrifying carnival scene alone marks this movie worthy of inclusion. If the last 15 minutes or so didn't exist—if we had just ended with the robot boy at the bottom of the ocean forever pining for something he can't have—it might crack Spielberg's top five.
8. Saving Private Ryan
The storming of Omaha Beach is, almost inarguably, the greatest filmed battle, ever. Period. And while I appreciate the cries against unearned sentimentality that are often leveled against Señor Spielbergo, this movie earns every tear shed in those final moments.
7. Minority Report
As a "vision of the future" movie, Minority Report is rather prescient, no? Leave aside the great touch screens and all that jazz. Ads and news custom designed for your needs? Self-driving cars? An overbearing government ready to imprison you for futurecrimes? Check, check, and ... well, not yet. We're almost there, though! Fingers crossed, we'll cross that Rubicon soon.
6. Duel
Arguably Spielberg's most efficient film, Duel is also in the running for "best TV movie ever." Right? To be honest, I'm not sure exactly what else would be on the list. Anyway. Duel is the sort of movie that feels like it could be made today thanks to its timelessness and yet could never, ever be made today thanks to the fact that filmmakers would try to fill in everyone's backstories. "What is the evil truck driver's motivation? Has he been wronged by society? We can't possibly trust the viewer to simply roll with this, can we? They need to have their hands held, their movies explained. SEND ME ANOTHER REWRITE, HACK."
5. Jaws
I thought about swapping Jaws and Duel—they're both "horror" films, and Duel is undoubtedly the tighter of the two—but that struck me as peevish and contrarian. I'm nothing if not a slave to conventional wisdom.
4. Jurassic Park
There are people such as Jeremy Senderowicz who do not think this is a good movie. These are garbage people who should not be trusted on matters of movies. Jonathan V. Last, on the other hand, is right: It's not only a great film but a great adaptation of a great book.
3. Schindler's List
I appreciate the complaints about the girl in the red coat. I understand Stanley Kubrick's point about telling a story of survival in a time of unimaginable death. And I simply don't care when I watch Liam Neeson deliver the "this pin" speech. Niagara Falls, Frankie Angel.
2. Close Encounters of the Third Kind
There's a story in Easy Riders, Raging Bulls about how George Lucas and John Milius swapped a "point" (that is, one percent of the profit) of Star Wars and Big Wednesday, Milius' surfing epic. Supposedly, Lucas asked for his point back from Milius. It's kind of hard to blame him. What's interesting is that Spielberg and Milius made the same trade for Close Encounters of the Third Kind and Big Wednesday—a trade that wasn't that much more damaging, financially. Close Encounters grossed $116 million in 1977, good for $400 million in 2015 dollars. Not bad for what amounts to a rather esoteric examination of the way power structures would respond to proof of alien life.
1. Raiders of the Lost Ark
It's a perfect movie. I don't mean it's the perfect movie or that it's the greatest movie. What I mean is that it does exactly what an action adventure movie is supposed to do: it keeps the plot moving, wastes exactly zero scenes, and remains immensely entertaining on repeat viewings. Plus, it's legitimately hilarious in a way that doesn't feel at all forced.