Polling analysts at the Washington Post have determined that elderly millionaire Hillary Clinton is viewed less favorably than Darth Vader, and would likely lose a hypothetical 2016 matchup against the prominent Sith Lord.
A recent FiveThirtyEight survey found that Vader enjoys a favorability rating of 58 percent, which is 12 points higher than Clinton’s. Only 30 percent of Americans view Vader unfavorably, compared to 45 percent of Americans who hold unfavorable views about Clinton.
According to a Washington Free Beacon analysis, Vader would hold several key advantages over Clinton in a 2016 Democratic primary, including:
- Age: Nerds on the Internet estimate that Vader is in his early to mid-40s, whereas Clinton would be 69 by the time she is sworn in, which would make her one of the oldest world leaders in history.
- Mobility: Clinton has yet to definitively disprove allegations that she requires the use of an old person’s walker to get around, whereas Vader is relatively nimble with a light saber, as well as a skilled pilot. Clinton, on the other hand, hasn’t driven a car in decades.
- Political machine: Who would you rather have on your side? Emperor Palpatine and Boba Fett? Or Sidney Blumenthal and David Brock? That's what we thought.
Of course, it's entirely possible that some of these factors could ultimately change in Clinton's favor. For example, she could fortify her political operation by selecting Joe Biden as a running mate, and/or she could become at least partially mechanized via a state of the art bionic pantsuit, which would significantly increase her mobility.