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The President Could Learn From Kate Upton

February 28, 2014

The White House spending five years keeping America's youth from jamming brownies down their throats has been one of the more humorously tone-deaf actions the current administration has bumbled through. Couples across the country hate it enough when their significant other chirps at them to hit the gym. What makes the First Lady think the government is any different?

The latest salvo from "Let’s Move" comes in the form of an Internet video starring the two most powerful men in America taking a lap around the White House. Why straightjacket the dynamite duo when you could have had the Best Left-Handed Shameless Gunner-in-Chief and Joe Biden, who's white and can jump, play a little roundball rock?

As DC's most fit online politics/foreign policy news site blogger, allow me to breakdown our amateur runners against a true athlete.

Below you see POTUS and VPOTUS in their campaign speech running forms, which are awful for arches and knees.
Joe:Barack Jog1

They should practice Kate Upton's flawless running form. See how she swings her arms and keeps her fists from clenching.

rsvlts.com
rsvlts.com

These two look like they are Batman and Robin. And no, I do not know who is Batman and who is Robin. Joe also looks like he suffers from over-pronation.
JB jog2

Kate on the other hand lifts her knees as she runs. That provides maximum force from your legs. When you don't pick your feet up, you're wasting energy, which can hurt you in the long run.

It's critical to stretch in any athletic endeavor. Don't hyperextend your knee there, Mr. President! You can get plantar fasciitis from that.
BJ Stretch

Notice how each amateur runner is stretching their calves and not their hips. All that horse riding taught Kate well.
Kate Upton

My main issue with this PSA is how water adverse the President and Vice President are. Moisture is the essence of wetness. And wetness is the essence of beauty. Uncle Joe isn't going to get by on those pearly whites for much longer if he doesn't hydrate.
JB Water

Kate knows the importance of hydration.

rsvlts.com
rsvlts.com

And look how she turned out.

Published under: Kate Upton