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Cities Where I'll Be Drinking Outside in 2014

megan621 Instagram
December 19, 2013

Like the Sixteenth and Seventeenth Amendments, the Eighteenth Amendment was a gross overreach of progressive politics. Thanks to efforts like the "Million Lush March" and campaigns like "Keep Your Hands of my Hooch," the Eighteenth Amendment was repealed in 1933, and today's Americans enjoy their liquor according to the laws of their state.

However, drinking in public—on the street, the sidewalk, in the alley, behind the tool shed, etc.— remains for the most part restricted, because no one wants to see what happens when a pack of wine coolers finds itself between two co-eds. Or at least that's what the authorities tell us. I for one do want to see what happens.

HuffPo finally made itself useful by examining municipal laws, zoning codes, and torts in all 50 states to find where in this country Americans enjoy the legal freedom to drink in public. If you need me, you'll find me in the following locations.

Huffington Post
Huffington Post

Hood River, Or.

Oregonians keep winning the day.

steddybetty Instagram
steddybetty Instagram

Sonoma, Ca.

Wine country!

tessienicolee Instagram
tessienicolee Instagram

Butte, Mt.

Sorry, I'm still giggling at the name. Butte. Hello ladies.

shandavis7 Instagram
shandavis7 Instagram

Las Vegas

The Wheel of Fortune is a lot more fun when you're drunk.

Tao Facebook
Tao Facebook

Lincoln, Ne.

Right after State College, Pa., and Iowa City, Ia., Lincoln is the best Big Ten town in the conference.

kailanordmeyer Instagram
kailanordmeyer Instagram

Kansas City, Mo.

Barbecue!

madisonxmarie Instagram
madisonxmarie Instagram

Dallas-Fort Worth

Good enough reason to be a Cowboys fan.

vismatt Instagram
vismatt Instagram

Fredericksburg, Tx.

I'm shocked there's not an even more random town in Texas that allows public drinking.

alicia0743 Instagram
alicia0743 Instagram

Indianapolis, In.

Naptown is an underrated Midwestern city.

thatgirlgooeylouie Instagram
thatgirlgooeylouie Instagram

Louisville, Ky.

Had to be drunk to watch Kevin Ware bust his leg.

kdhays Instagram
kdhays Instagram

Memphis, Tn.

Memphis is known for its music and food, all of which are improved by public intoxication.

k8lynsue Instagram
k8lynsue Instagram

Alabama

Alabama has the highest number of individual cities that allow public drinking. Since all Alabama is good for is National Championships, I figure we'd group that together in one state, for the good of you, the reader. Don't tell me I don't help you out from time to time.

stsmiley Instagram
stsmiley Instagram

Gulfport, Ms.

You've got to be drunk to dodge hurricanes and Brett Favre.

meganvelez Instagram
meganvelez Instagram

New Orleans

Drunk in public? Who dat?

megan621 Instagram
megan621 Instagram

Savannah, Ga.

Drunk dawgs on top.

kerrynhorn Instagram
kerrynhorn Instagram

Erie, Pa.

It makes sense that Erie is the only Northeastern city to permit public drinking since you might as well be in Canada.

kms1471 Instagram
kms1471 Instagram

If your town isn't on this list, fear not. Mask that Four Loko in a brown bag and drink away. And if cop asks why you are stumbling in the street, tell him you have rights and the po po need a warrant for that. Then see what happens next.

Published under: Smokes