If you're ranking populations that use D.C. roadways by their general level of terribleness, the list, from least to most terrible, looks something like this:
- Virginia drivers
- D.C. drivers
- Jaywalking pedestrians
- Maryland drivers*
- Bus drivers
- Cabbies
- Bicyclists
Bicyclists are definitely the worst. But cabbies are a very close second, swerving in and out of traffic when they're not crawling along at 15 mph in the right hand lane trying to pick up fares who have no interest in being picked up. The one saving grace of cab drivers is that they actually do serve a useful function, helping people get from point to point when they don't have access to their own vehicle or time to wait for the Metro.
That usefulness is limited, however, because D.C. cabbies are pretty terrible about simply refusing fares to places they don't want to go to. An investigation released two days ago by the D.C. Taxicab Commission found a "refusal to haul rate" of 27 percent. It's just this sort of thing that has led to the explosion of app-based car-for-hire services such as Uber and Lyft: people are more likely to patronize a company that will actually get them where they want to go than take their chances with D.C.'s awful cabbies.
Yesterday, D.C.'s cabbies, chastened by their record of lawlessness and horrible customer service, begged forgiveness from passengers and promised to clean up their act.
LOL, j/k, they actually blocked traffic in the streets of D.C. to protest Uber and Lyft.
Hundreds of cab drivers blocked downtown traffic and blared their vehicles' horns Wednesday afternoon to protest proposed legislation they say unfairly regulates services like Uber and Lyft.
"Give us justice!" drivers holding a Teamsters banner shouted as police initially stopped vehicles at 13th Street and Pennsylvania Avenue NW. Cab drivers were eventually allowed to continue toward Freedom Plaza and the Wilson Building, where most of the anger was directed.
They really don't get it, do they? They're going to try and win the hearts and minds of the people by ... horribly inconveniencing them? For serious?
D.C. cab drivers are the worst. Well, okay, they're not the worst. Bicyclists are the worst. But damn if the cabbies aren't giving the bicyclists a run for their money.
*I'm convinced that people from Maryland don't actually know how to drive and that idiotic state just hands out licenses to any fool who asks for one. Awful drivers, Marylanders.