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The Establishment Strikes Back: Amtrak to Launch Non-Stop Acela Service from D.C. to New York

New service will serve some of the most despised professional classes in American life

July 25, 2019

America's political establishment is under attack, and it's just not fair. It's gotten so bad that political reporters can't even hang out and sip cocktails with leading politicians at Maureen Dowd's house in Georgetown without getting ridiculed by the filthy rubes who wouldn't know a green room from a fried green tomato with jalapeño aioli.

In the old days, big shot journos could casually boast about their attendance at these élite soirées and feel good about themselves. Now everything is ruined. On a related note: Congress and the media are among the most loathed institutions in the country.

Donald Trump's election in 2016 was a humiliating defeat not only for Hillary Clinton, but also the establishment that backed her candidacy and assumed she couldn't possibly lose. They were wrong, but they're not going down without a fight. This recent announcement suggests the establishment's counter-attack is already in the works.

This new service will almost exclusively serve some of the most despised professional classes in American life: Politicians, journalists, lobbyists, bankers, rich people who can't afford to fly private, and other city-dwelling neo-liberals who want to "save the environment" by banning cars and letting 1,000 Acela corridors bloom across the land with the help of exorbitant government subsidies. No one else is particularly excited about this news.

This excitement is presumably tempered, however, by a lingering anxiety regarding the taking of group selfies on the train. Acela passengers might have to think twice before posting those photos on a popular social media website. That's on us. Think before you comment, and be mindful of everything these heroes have sacrificed for the greater good. They're people, too. Sort of.

Published under: Joe Biden