Cam Newton is one of the sorest losers of all time, a pouty wreck when things don't go his way who spent the first portion of his career getting reamed by the great Steve Smith for being such a whiny whinging whiner. I don't particularly care for the guy and thought the attempt to salvage his image this year—He dances! He smiles! He gives footballs to kids!—was humorous and almost certainly doomed to failure.
And Cam didn't disappoint! I watched his postgame presser after last night's Super Bowl live and it was an epic of non-answers and pouting, capped off by his just kind of ... leaving. Cam was totally channeling his inner Eli Cash:
If you listen closely, you can practically hear Cam whispering "Von Miller ... pewwwwww" before saying "I'm done, man." Given that he was trying to do his press avail right next to one of the opposition corner backs bragging about how they shut him down, I can't help but feel some pity:
THIS is why Cam walked out (listen to what's being said in the background). pic.twitter.com/6LdLFwv8tj
— Brian (@bmweezy13) February 8, 2016
Anyway. I can't get worked up about Newton not wanting to do the press conference. Yes, I know, it's part of the job. Yes, he shouldn't be such a whiny man-baby. But, also, I feel some compassion for the guy. Imagine on the worst day of your professional life (or maybe life, period) being asked a series of asinine questions like "How does this make you feel?" and "What went wrong?" and "Do you feel bad about failing to accomplish your dreams?" So silly.
The least convincing argument, as far as I'm concerned, is the one that goes like this: "Yes, but this is why they get paid millions of dollars, to talk to reporters after games." Uh, no. They get paid millions of dollars to win football games. Your average fan doesn't really care about canned responses to idiotic questions from mouth-breathing scribes. (Sorry, fellow mouth-breathers; I report, you decide.)
But, as an accountant notes,* Cam Newton didn't even really get paid for playing in the game. Indeed, he got financially punished for appearing in the Super Bowl. Because of California's insanely high marginal tax rates and the absurdity of allowing states to tax traveling players for the number of days they spend in the state, Newton actually lost money by playing in the Super Bowl:
In looking at the seven days Newton will spend in California this week for Super Bowl 50, he will pay the state $101,600 on $102,000 of income should the Panthers be victorious or $101,360 on $51,000 should they lose.
The result: Newton will pay California 99.6% of his Super Bowl earnings if the Panthers win. Losing means his effective tax rate will be a whopping 198.8%. Oh yeah, he will also pay the IRS 40.5% on his earnings.
This is just one of the reasons we shouldn't worry too much when California falls into the Pacific after getting rocked by The Big One. What a dreadful state.
It's also one of the reasons I feel some modicum of pity for Newton. He didn't just lose the biggest game of his life and reinforce all the talking points about his bad attitude and whiny personality.
He got charged for the pleasure of doing so.
(h/t Gabriel Malor)