ACT I SCENE I
Five Russians—three men, two women—sit in a circle. One could mistake the gathering for an AA meeting; trembling fingers hold Styrofoam coffee cups and the eyes of all present dart nervously about. The walls are bare. A clock rings 12, signifying the time for the clandestine gathering to get underway.
Mikhail Khodorkovsky: Thank you all for coming. I know it can be harder for some to make it than others [glances at the semi-transparent woman to his left]. But it’s important to keep in touch. Alexei, it’s … well, not a pleasure exactly. But we’re glad you could make it.
Alexei Navalny: Yes, well, what are you going to do? I’m just glad I live in a nation so committed to protecting the little guy’s rights!
Garry Kasparov: [Eyebrows raised] Eh?
Anna Politkovskaya’s Ghost: You haven’t heard? Too busy coming up with new variations to stay abreast of the news, Kasper?
Garry: Spill it, spook.
Nadezhda Tolokonnikova: It’s that nincompoop. The one holed up in the airport, with the laptops.
Garry: Oh god. Snowden?
Anna: Yup. He’s pleading with Putin for asylum, and said … said … [looks away]
Alexei: It’s okay, Anna. He said that Russia, and I quote, stands against human rights violations carried out by the powerful rather than the powerless.
Kasparov: No he didn’t.
Nadezhda: Da.
Alexei: As I said, it was a real relief to know that such a committed advocate of human rights was jailing me for political protest.
Mikhail: Is this guy really that stupid? He does understand what’s going on in Mother Russia, right?
Nadezhda: I dunno. I like to think he’s just a coward trying to save his own skin for stealing his nation’s secrets. I’m down with trashing imperialists, of course —
Garry: We’re well aware, Neda.
Nadezhda: — but he’s really coming across as kind of a dick here.
Garry: One wonders where these champions of the little guy were when Putin’s goons were trying to snap my legs as I protested for your freedom, Neda. Or where the defender of the little guy was when security agents were murdering Anna for daring to report on their crimes.
Anna: Blyadischa!
Mikhail: Is he actually unaware that Freedom House rates Russia "not free"? This hero of the Internet wants to flee to a nation that censors its websites? That murders its journalists?
Alexei: I guess next time before I speak up I’ll steal a bunch of secrets from the Americans. Then maybe Putin and I can be friends too.
[The lights dim as our dissidents sit there, shaking their heads. Elsewhere, Edward Snowden makes a mockery of their suffering.]
Fin.