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Gomez v. Hudgens

AP
December 18, 2013

The price of being crowned a Disney Princess is a hefty one. The G-Rated kingdom is no place for a maturing actor.

To celebrate Vanessa Hudgens's twenty-fifth birthday, let's compare Hudgens with her fellow House of Mouse comrade/Spring Breakers co-star Serena Gomez, and see who has a more promising future.

I. Speed

Hudgens has oodles of speed and takes her talents all over the land.

Vanesa Hudgens Instagram
Vanesa Hudgens Instagram

Her underwater speed is incredible.

Vanesa Hudgens Instagram
Vanesa Hudgens Instagram

Also, she's patriotic.

Vanessa Hudgens Instagram
Vanessa Hudgens Instagram

Gomez, on the other hand, is more of a traditional pop star.

Selena Gomez Instagram
Selena Gomez Instagram

Though she does enjoy connecting with fans.

Selena Gomez Instagram
Selena Gomez Instagram

She's most agile at the club, sans Bieber.
SafariScreenSnapz149

WINNER: Hudgens

1-0 Hudgens

II. Booty Poppin'

Thanks to another certain Disney sweetheart who's taken a considerably different approach to adulthood, we are required to judge our pop princesses by how well they twerk.

Hudgens can swerve when called upon.
Vanessa Hudgens

Meanwhile, Gomez has been touring relentlessly to promote her sub-par pop album.
Selena Gomez

WINNER: Gomez

1-1, all.

III. Spring Breakers

Hudgens was the wild card in the film. Therefore, she was also my favorite character.

Complex
Complex

Selena played the reluctant rager.

Complex
Complex

Disappointingly, her role in the film was of the Debbie Downer. Nobody likes a Debbie Downer.

Complex
Complex

WINNER: Hudgens

OVERALL WINNER: 2-1, While Gomez is peddling weak music, Hudgens is acting in challenging roles. If we learned anything this year, pop music is on the decline, while this country likes nothing more than watching actors mature.

Throwdown, Hudgens.

Published under: Smokes