- Washington Free Beacon - https://freebeacon.com -

Seven Alternative Press-Containment Strategies for Hillary Clinton

Journeyman presidential candidate Hillary Clinton literally roped off the press during a Fourth of July parade in New Hampshire over the weekend.

In fairness to Hillary, some of the reporters following her campaign were attempting to do their jobs. 

Rope is a simple and reasonably efficient way to prevent the press from entering Hillary's safe space, but if her campaign is serious about insulating the candidate from filthy reporters, they may want to consider the following alternatives.

1. Backhoe

2. Horse Trailer

3. Invisible Fence

4. Toddler Harness

5. Mad Max Method

6. Truckasaurus

7. Dikembe Mutombo