Hillary Clinton really, really wants you to join her, a new Free Beacon SuperCut shows.
In a persuasive show of enthusiasm, Clinton has taken to shouting different variations of the phrase "Join me!" at campaign events from Iowa to Nevada.
Though voters consistently say that Clinton is dishonest and untrustworthy, her knack for convincing people to fight for her might change things.
Some have speculated that Clinton is a robot. However, her soft, wispy way of saying, "join me" in intimate settings seems to refute that claim. In addition, though many are wary of taking Clinton at her word, she has also insisted that she is a "real person."
After extensive research, the Free Beacon has come to believe that Clinton’s compelling way of asking people to join her is reminiscent of another, more sinister character: the fallen Jedi Knight Darth Vader.
Indeed, this SuperCut concludes, Hillary Clinton is not a robot–not a "real person"–nay, not even "a grandmother with two eyes and a brain"–but a Sith Lord.