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The Hipster Baby Name Craze Must Stop

Wikimedia Commons
October 28, 2014

Young parents are determined to name their newborns something creative and unique, no matter what burden that name may put on their progeny. With names such as "Brooklyn" and "Milo" bordering on mainstream because of their ubiquity, the dawn of the hipster baby name has almost ensured a future generation of Pajama Boys.

FitPregnancy.com has compiled the latest hipster baby names that evoke a painfully deliberate need for nonconformity.

At the risk of finding partisan politics in every little aspect of American life, is it fair to speculate that only an Obama/Hillary voter would saddle their munchkin with names like this?

Here are some of the more popular boy names sure to inspire a confrontation on an elementary school playground:

Auden
Enoch
Lennon
Nico
Salinger
Zane

Auden...?  Really? Might as well name your kid "Lachlan."

Meanwhile, the girl names evoke characters yet to be created by Lena Dunham for the HBO series "Girls."

Briseida
Liora
Odette
Romy
Wren
Zola

Here's a fantastic public service that you'll thank me for later:

If you're dating a special someone and things are getting serious, you might start that "what would you name our baby" game that many young couples engage in. If your significant other starts throwing around "Briseida" or "Lennon" as prospective names for your first-born, you might want to re-think your future plans, before it's too late.