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Hillary Clinton Parks Luxury Van in Handicapped Parking Spot In Desperate Appeal to Youth Voters

Youthful disregard for authority.
April 16, 2015

Journeyman presidential candidate Hillary Clinton is desperate to portray herself as youthful and attuned to the concerns of "everyday Americans." These efforts were on full display Thursday when, in an attempt to associate herself with the celebrity heroes of our nation’s youth—and in another slight at differently abled people—Hillary parked her expensive luxury vehicle in a handicapped parking spot.*

In doing so, Hillary was simply emulating the behavior of countless youth celebrities who do not believe the normal rules of society apply to them. Now, to be fair, this might be something of a "chicken or the egg" scenario, as the young celebrities may in fact be emulating Hillary’s own dogged refusal to abide by the rules and regulations governing the life of lowly plebeians. However, this attitude is most commonly observed in younger generations, and Hillary was born just two years after the bombing of Hiroshima. So, it’s a toss up.

Noteworthy celebs who have demonstrated their youthful disregard for "rules" by parking luxury vehicles in a handicapped parking space include:

Miley Cyrus

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Vanessa Hudgens

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Usher

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Chris Brown

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Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino

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None of these young celebs, however, can hold a candle to Justin Bieber, who in addition to famously shouting "F*ck Bill Clinton!" after urinating in a mop bucket, once pretended to be handicapped in order to skip the lines at Disneyland.

What sort of stunt will Hillary pull next?

*It may very well be the case that Hillary’s van has a valid handicapped parking permit. The debate over her mobility remains open.